(the general history of us being a system) ok so theirs kinda been 2(or kinda 2.5 but the ".5" was a system that only lasted a week and was basicly the proto current one) the 1rst one was like generaly the summer befor first grade and second grade and a bit of 3rd maybe (thought this is very hard to remember obyyesly) and it was 4 (and maybe 5 later) "sonas" with one just being "us" (the main voice in our head), then for the current system (thought for basicly our whole life we would allwes have a "counter voice" in our head to basicly just comment and make kinda fun of stuff we thing, and i have no idea if this is a common thing) basicly befor we "split" in early novembur of 7th we have been reading wings of fire sence like our birthday in 6th but never checked if they exest online, (so we did that) and found youtubers like dragoon sheep and cyprus then that eventaly became things for warrior cats during the fall break (also somewhere around this time i think our main freandgroup splits up and i basicly lose half of it) with yts like akira and moonkitti the latter of witch a coople weeks later (like the first week of desembur) we trased a drawing of mapple shade and added some white spots and named him (we also didn't know mappleshade's gender lol) frecklefur or freckfur for short (freckfur became the sona to get added into the system, while frecklefur is still tecnickly a very not used warriors oc), then on our 3rd class on the thersday on the second week to winter break in theator class (a "do nothing class") while lessening to azazal (which yeah i have no idea how we found that) we saw a random story time by chipflake then in english (the class emedently after that) (defenitly had more work than theater but still had some "do nothing" days and ig that day was one of them) we found the paws and play meme by dwagon, 3200원 감귤, and kittydog (we didn't realy like the kittydog one so she got kinda shafted for a bit), so in the week that followed an anthrosized (or two-legged) vertion of freckfur got made and a just fecken stolen sona from 3200원 감귤, named esten (currently named fukca) got made, and there were already "debates" between parts of ourself on if we were a furry or not, and we were already kinda starting to split, then for like all but a week of winter break we went on vacation with our famaly, durring that vacation where we didn't have that much interaction with others we finaly became a furry and the first true 3 sonas were created: the 2-legged versoin of freckfur became lorden (now named lora) mainly the one the for being a furry (also at the time the only one with fur at all), low self confedence, and hevy respect for inflences and others in general, easten geting the snarky replies from the "other voice" and mostly being the snarky, memey side (also the only one with positive self confedence), and also generaly not caring if we're a furry or not, the [littlerly just our fecken deadname], (curently named ly) design stolen from some random fluffen "masks are cool" art, on the bus to the airport lol and ice cream sandwich being the general "anti us being a furry" and more hostile to change, while low trust in ourself, and most irl talking to people + school and famaly, then after the vecation but still in early january, quibi (still fine with being called that but most commenly balled quila now), basicly lora with wings + in a more "kittydog style" (cause she came back on chrismis eve with supperposition to repersent our subconshes emotions and stuff, then latter freckfur got to repersent our subconshes reactions and like instinks and stuff (and got wings even thought we were agenst warroir cats getting wings lol), and becam kinda agressive. most of this stuff (expesaly for the first cupple sonas) happened with a design being made, then that design just getting part of our persinality or made to repersent something, then they kinda just like "took over" cause 1, we were debating stuff and changing, and 2 we were just lonly (Expesaly with our freand group just dieing befor this)
(what we think this is, and why it exists) we do not know that much information about disosetive personality disourders but we think the reson why we spilt is simply us being lonly and the reaction and debait around change (both internal and external) then ignated by the even more rapid changed in envirment of the vecation, it took us like 5 months after we split to even reolies anything about disourders simaler to did, from that carpy spocture vid (we won't be linking cause its kinda bad and we don't like spocture anymore resuchurch at your own risk lol) then kinda nothing and only now (like 1.75 years later) are just starting our reserach on stuff (and even if we agree it would be stated weird like "to the best of our reaserch we can say their is a high probobility that are experences refect someone with osdd1-b") and we our still early into resurch
(why are we writing this) cause it just feels nice to kinda vent (igs its technicly a kinda light vent) and to just write this, even thought we know that no one will proboly achaly see this, we just like the idea of writing something that could be technicly seen publicly (if were feling relly couragus we might share this to our devent art where like 1 to 3 people will see this) (speaking about devent art if you want to contact us just go there we just kinda don;t check our neocities profile like ever XD, but yeah (tbh thats kinda why we post most of our art cause we just like teh idea that someone can see it (eveb if it's onli liek 20 people))
(conclushion) (wow this also proved how wordy and over explaind we gotten lol(like omfg so much perenfases inside perenfases lol) so what we will be concluding with this is (as aluded to befor) "to the best of our reaserch we can say their is a high probobility that are experences refect someone with osdd1-b" (or at least a simaler disability thought we are still resurching), but honestly more improtanty i kinda reolised that diegnosis or not, we will proboly stay like this for at least the next year or 2 (this is the most venty we will go here, but we do go to theripy (for other resouns) and are kinda to scard to talk about stuff like this to the therapist and yeah ik its dumb but idk) and we kinda don't talk to anyone about this (which proboly just makes us more lonly cause we feel like we have to hide ourselfs, which proboly ferthers this so yeahhhh), but stupit vent side tangent over diegnosis or no, this proboly won;t be going away anytime soon (trust me we have tried) so yeah (this conclution was ment to be positive but was kinda the most negitive thing here)